Cancer has unexpected effect of bonding strangers nearly instantly

By RuthAnn Hogue

The book store in Seattle was delightful. The ambience of the red-brick arches, hard-wood floors and aisles and aisles of books and the friendly people of the Elliott Bay Book Co. both exceeded my expectations.

One woman I met who bought a signed copy was a vacationing hospice worker from Minnesota. She and I talked a bit about pain management and the sad truth that there is still fear about taking enough meds to ease the pain because it might cause addiction. I hardly believe someone who is terminally ill is going to become a threat to society because of their pain meds. It's ridiculous, to say the least. She was so sweet and genuinely interested in the topic.

I met others who have recently lost family members who would come up to my table and take a quick peek at the display and then as if to avoid some horrible fate would quickly turn away. A few of them took a few steps back and then with their arms safely wrapped around themselves would apologetically explain that they recently lost a loved one and that while they want to read my book, that it is just "too soon" to even pick it up and thumb through the pages. They gladly accepted book marks which they generally tucked away carefully in a purse.

One explained she'd recently lost her husband. Another was in the process of losing one, and had a neighbor down the street who was losing his wife. The latter bought a copy for her neighbor and had me personalize it in his wife's name. She said she would buy another copy for herself when she got home because she only had room in her luggage for one and wanted to be sure her neighbors received the personalized volume.

Others were in a stage in which they wanted -- perhaps desperately needed -- a listening ear. I got to hear about battles with cancer that sometimes ended with the disease being in remission or the sufferer having long since departed.

Once again, my trip confirmed what I have learned during previous "Goodbye, Walter" events: The bond between strangers who have witnessed the pain of cancer is not only immediate, but surprisingly strong.

May God bless each and every one of them who read Walter's story (or don't because they can't, as the case may be).

-- RuthAnn
http://www.goodbye-walter.com



Mrs. Kenney, top left, stands in with her 1969-1970 second-grade class at Beacon Heights Elementary School in Salt Lake City. RuthAnn (Hesterman) Hogue is pictured in the third row down, sixth from the left.

Author RuthAnn Hogue searches for the teacher who inspired her to write

Mrs. Kenney likely had no idea that colorful construction paper cutouts of white snowballs in January and yellow umbrellas in April would instill lessons that would last a lifetime.

The Beacon Heights second-grade teacher tantalized students all year with the opportunity to print our names on them for each poem they wrote, and staple them to a cork bulletin board.

Back then, when my family and I lived on Texas Street at about 21st South in Salt Lake City, I used to count my name on display each morning. If anyone was ever caught nipping at my heels, I would dash out several more lines of prose.

When we weren't otherwise occupied with writing or art assignments, we used to sit in a circle and read aloud from the "Dick and Jane" series.

I have to wonder if little Sally in "Sally, Dick and Jane" has anything to do with the fact that my child who shares the same birth order and name as Sally did with her older brother and sister.

There are some things we'll never know for sure.

In any case, I learned to enjoy public speaking, in a manner of speaking, while discovering some new adventure of those silly kids and their dog, Spot.

Of course, having broadcasting in my blood, I always tried to read with proper pacing and voice inflection. My father was then a DJ at KNAK, then a local middle-of-the-road format station and my classmates never let me forget it.

That competitive spirit, born in Mrs. Kenney's classroom, served me well long after I left Utah when my family moved to Arizona in 1970.

Once settled in a Phoenix neighborhood, I quickly became friends with the librarian at Sevilla Elementary School. Being separated from my lifetime playmates and not willing to immediately brave the desert heat to find new ones, my passion for reading and writing continued to blossom.

After taking time to start a family and work full time after high school, I eventually returned to school.

My program of study?

Journalism, of course, which just happened to be offered at nearby Arizona State University's prestigious Walter Cronkite School of Telecommunications and Journalism.

By then, however, I was no longer composing poetry by hand on large- ruled school paper. My work early work as a student and professional journalist often appeared simultaneously in student publications and in The Arizona Republic, the largest daily newspaper West of the Mississippi, save The Los Angeles Times.

Numerous academic and professional awards later, the Department of Journalism at the University of Arizona invited me to join its staff as an adjunct journalism instructor.

Just like Mrs. Kenney, I had the chance to instill in my students a love of writing and a passion for doing one's best.

I like to think Mrs. Kenney would be proud.

My secret wish, now that I've joined the ranks of published authors whose books I once curled up with for hours on end as a child?

To be reunited with Mrs. Kenney or a family member and have the chance to thank her or someone on her behalf, for in her own small way inspiring me toward my most recent success.

So, Mrs. Kenney, if you're out there, please be in touch. I'd love to hear from you.

Oh, and if you are able to, please accept a complimentary signed copy of "Goodbye, Walter" at my upcoming visit to from noon to 2 p.m. Oct. 1 at Sam Weller's Zion Book Store, 254 South Main Street in Salt Lake City. Your money won't be any good there.

I wouldn't have it any other way.


-- RuthAnn
http://www.goodbye-walter.com




Mark Hesterman, RuthAnn (Hesterman) Hogue and David Hesterman pose for a photo on Oct. 1 during the book-signing portion of RuthAnn's public reading from "Goodbye, Walter" at Sam Weller's Zion Book Store in Salt Lake City.




Bill Hesterman enjoys a moment on stage with the band he helped launch to success and fame.

Signing books, seeing family turns out to be fun, fun fun
My Uncle Bill, Aunt Barbara and Cousins Mark and David are in the news again with their fun-loving, beach partying friends. It shouldn't really be a surprise, considering that the Beach Boys are deeply imbedded in the fabric of the Hesterman family.

It should be no surprise, then, that the Beach Boys are mentioned in
the epilogue of "Goodbye, Walter," when I tell my father's story. After all, my earliest memory of choosing a favorite song was when the Beach Boys released the ballad "In My Room."

It was no surprise either when David had familiar Beach Boys tunes blaring in his Cadillac Escalade when he came to pick me up after a recent book signing at Sam Weller's Zion Book Store in Salt Lake City.

Who they were then will always be a part of who we are.

My oldest brother, Bryce, called the following two articles to my attention. We Hestermans are passing them around to each other by email to make sure no one misses out.

I have a feeling that we aren't the only ones enjoying this visit down memory lane. You can join all of the fun, fun fun by visiting the following
links:

Shirley's had fun, fun, fun with her 41 years of 'fame'
By Doug Robinson
Deseret Morning News
http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,625152574,00.html

Beach Boys are fun, fun, fun friends
By Doug Robinson
Deseret Morning News
http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,635154125,00.html


Enjoy!
-- RuthAnn
http://www.goodbye-walter.com